As published in The Florida Villager
Through talking with people, I realize there is still a little mystery as to what exactly a divorce coach does. In response to this I came up with bullet points in three different areas to help provide clarity and insight into the role of a divorce coach. Even some attorneys aren’t always completely clear, however the American Bar Association recognizes divorce coaching as “a flexible, goal oriented process designed to support, motivate and guide people going through divorce to help them make the best possible decisions for their future, based on their particular interests, needs and concerns.”
Divorce coaches are not lawyers, therapists or financial advisors but we are a thinking partner and compliment to an attorney.
Also, there is a misconception that working with a divorce coach will drive up the cost of your divorce when in fact, working with a divorce coach can save you tons of money. People tend to call their attorneys for non-legal advice or venting whereas communicating with a divorce coach to discuss non-legal issues can be significantly more cost-friendly.
Helping people divorce in a different way that promotes peace making and co-parenting. What can you expect from a collaborative divorce?
- Open communication
- Cooperative approach rather than litigation approach
- Child centric
- Safe and secure setting
- Needs of the family are priority
- Exchange information and explore choices
- Knowledgeable support team to help discuss and negotiate
- Helps to restructure your family not tear it apart
Divorce is a time of challenge and uncertainty but working with a coach can help ease the emotional pain, fear and the sense of being overwhelmed. It is the bridge into a new life of endless possibilities. What can you expect from your coach during your divorce?
- Someone who understands the divorce process
- Helps to create a roadmap through divorce and after
- Co-parent planning and communication skills
- Solution-based guidance
- Conflict management
- Aid in reducing stress and managing emotions
- Organizational assistance
- Identify and prioritize your concerns
- Assist you when needed with your attorney
- Keep you motivated and your eye on the big picture
Life After Divorce
Just because the papers have been signed doesn’t mean your life falls back into place. What can you expect from your coach after your divorce?
- Post divorce checklist
- Defined action plan
- Employment options
- Self rediscovery/finding your purpose
- Single parent guidance
- Post divorce emotional support
- Different approaches to problem solving
- Help dealing with a difficult ex
- Challenges of being single again
Bare in mind that divorce coaching is specific to the individual needs and where you are in the process. If you still have questions about working with a coach or want to find out if it is the right option for you, feel free to email me at Debbie@transformationthrudivorce.com and remember, divorce does not define you; how you navigate it and what you do with your life afterwards does. Stand strong!